Mahjong Guide for Total Idiots v1.00

Contents

Ctrl + F to search
Basic
-Mahjong introduction ----(MI)
-How to play -------------(H2P)
-Tiles -------------------(TL)
-Collide/Eat -------------(CE)
-Winning -----------------(WN)
-Losing ------------------(LS)

Intermediate
-Different ways to win ---(W2W)
-Tai ---------------------(TAI)
-Winds -------------------(WND)

Advanced
-Preventing enemies
from winning

Part 1: The Basics

Mahjong Introduction ----(MI)

Mahjong, or Mah-jong, or Mahjongg, or Mahjonng, or whatever the hell you spell it, is a card game, except:
You don't use cards. You use freaking huge and heavy tiles that are ugly .(Mine looks like some coconut kueh)

How to play -------------(H2P)

So you see these huge pile of tiles (148 without the animals, 152 with animals).
Arrange it to form rows of 18, and lay another row of 18 on it. The Host, or 庄, and the person playing opposite, will put a row of 19, and put another row of 19 on the first row. As long as the Host wins, the Host is not changed. Otherwise, the next person (depending on which direction you go), will be the Host. The person opposite the Host must place 19 tiles, and so on.

The Host will throw 2 dice to calculate which row to take the tiles, and throw two more dice, to calculate the position where he should take the first four tiles. So if he throws two fours, and later throws a three and a five, he would count (starting from himself), going clockwise. The player to his left would be 2, and so on. So when rolling 4/8/12 you will take from the row on your right side. The next 2 dice, a total of 8, is used to calculate where you take your tiles (from the row). 8 means counting from the RIGHT 8 tiles, and take 4 tiles (2 above 2 below) and place it in your side. Deal this way to everyone (clockwise) until everyone has 12 tiles. Then, the Host jump cards, or 跳牌， where he takes one tile, ignore the one below, the one next to it, and the one below the one next to it, and take the tile. (If this confuses you, this means take the tile 2 tiles to the LEFT of the first tile.)

The Host starts by throwing a tile. But first, flower cards (1,2,3,4 of blue or red coloured weird tiles, as well as the centipede, cockerel, cat and mouse) must be placed face down. Then, take tiles from where you STARTED dealing. Then, after the Host has thrown, other players (including the host on his next turn), will take tiles from where you STOPPED dealing.

Tiles -------------------(TL)

There are different types of tiles (namely 5 types). They are 万（10 thousands), 索 (bamboo shoots), 桐 (doughnut, boobs, hole, whatever you name it in english), 风向 （东,南,西,北,中,发,白板）are the wind directions. They will be explained later. The remaining is the 花。They are used to collect cards (as explained above). Some of them will have 台， which is used to calculate winnings.

Collide/Eat -------------(CE)

Collide/Eat , or 碰，吃，are the two main ways to get combinations to win (Which will be discussed later.) When you have two of the same tiles, and someone (no matter who) tosses one of those, you may claim it for your own by saying peng loudly. You must place the three tiles face down, and toss out one tile. The person on your left will continue on.

When you have two consecutive tiles, and someone BEFORE you tosses one tile that can allow you to form three consecutive tiles (like you have 1/2 and someone tosses 3), arrange these three IN ORDER and place them face down. You must say 吃 very loudly, or people will skip your turn. Toss out one tile.

杠 happens when you have 3 of the same, and someone tosses one of the same out (or you get one). If one person tosses it, its called 明杠。 If you take it yourself, its called 暗杠。 If you 明杠, take one tile from the flower side (read above) and toss one out. Everyone must pay you one tai. If you 暗杠, do the same, except claim 2 tai.

You may not eat from people who are not before you (opposite, after you or yourself)

Winning -----------------(WN)

The most basic way of winning is explained here. Basically, you must get 4 set of 3-combo, mainly 3-of-a-kind (2/2/2), or 3-consecutive (1/2/3) and a pair of eyes (a pair of the same tile). You may find it weird, that you are forced to win with 14 tiles when you start with 13. When you have one tile left, as long as anyone throws that tile out, stand up, shake the table, and say 胡 (dunno whether correct chinese spelling or not)，and you win! But if you do NOT win, and say hu, you are disqualified from the match (诈胡)，and if you play money, you must pay everyone the cost of one tai, which will be discussed later. 屁胡，or winning without tai, is discouraged, since you must pay everyone one tai, unless you have a set combo or you got the winning tile yourself.

Losing ------------------(LS)

Read the above, and when it applies to someone else, you have lost!

Intermediate

Different ways to win ---(W2W)

You can win with the following combos for more tai (bonus in brackets).

The 4 basic wins
1. 清一色 （7)
Your whole hand must be of the same house (万，桐，索）

2. 四大罗汉 (12)
You must 杠 (get 4 of a kind) 4 times before winning.

3. 大四喜 (12)
You must win by having combos of 东， 南， 西，北。Combine with 2 for devastating results.

4. 十三妖 （13)
Get 东,南,西,北,中,发,白板,一万，九万，一索，九索， 一桐，九桐。

Tai ---------------------(TAI)
A tai, taiwan that tai, not shit in malay, is a point that you score. You need at least one tai to win so that you dun zhahu, as noted far above.

Ways to gain tai
Get 3 of a kind of your wind direction including 中,发,白板. (The current host is East, to his left is south, opposite him is west, and to his right is north; everyone will gain tai if they peng or 中,发,白板.). You will gain 1 tai. If you kang your wind (4 of a kind), add 2 more tai.

The wind that you are playing now (N,E,S,W) will add one tai or 3 tai if you peng or kang respectively.

Get a flower that has your number (1 is host, 2 is his left, 3 is opposite, 4 is his right). Add one tai. If you get an animal, add one tai each. If you get 2 animals (Must be cock and centipede or cat and mouse) add a total of 3 tai for them (2 for the animals, one bonus).

Winds -------------------(WND)
Winds are North, South, East, West, Center (Zhong), Hair (Fa) and Whiteboard (Bai Ban).

Advanced Technique
(PEW)
Do the Basic 6 items Checklist Copyrighted by Lim Pei to see which tile you should throw.

1. Did someone throw that card before? If yes, tick once. If not, don't tick.

2. Do you need that tile? If not, tick. If yes, don't tick.

3. Is it a POSSIBLE way for an enemy to finish the game? If not, tick. If yes, don't tick.tck.

4. Does an enemy need it for the Green One Colour combo? If not, tick. If yes, don't tick.

5. Is that tile COMMON (Ten and Ninety thousand, One and Nine bamboo, One and Nine Doughnut, all wind directions)? If yes, tick. If not, don't tick.

6. If that person is holding to one tile, and need ONE more to WIN. If the tile that you want to throw is common, do not tick. Otherwise, tick.

7. If your enemy has 5 tai or more and is winning; do not tick. Otherwise, tick.

If you have 4-7 ticks, toss the tile out. If you have 1-4 ticks, do not toss it out. If you have 4, decide which is the better choice yourself.

Cheats and Secrets:
When an enemy is taking the tile, watch closely where he/she places it. Even better: Try to spy what it is. If you cannot, wait until your enemy tosses a tile next to where he/she placed that original one next to. Usually, the tile will be a -2 to +2 difference, unless it is of another set.

Outpsych an enemy. Fake them that you need a certain card, but is instead waiting for a close card (Like you're waiting for a 2 you tell them not to toss 1.)

If it does not work, use reverse psychology. If you need a 2, tell them that if they play a 2, you win.

If an enemy has 5 tai or more and is winning, and you can win but is a fart win (屁胡), be a man. just do it. Paying 3 tai (1 to each) is better than all of you paying 15 tai together to one person.

Last tip: Note a player's characteristics. Some important tips on the way some DHS students play:

Mabel : Doesn't play.

Ting Pei: Wear her patience down with super long games. She will eventually play what you want, or play nonsense-ly.

Chia Wan Ting : Reverse psychology works best.

Cherie : Guard tiles properly, do not think that she's a noob, or she will own you.

Suat Yee : She places cards in nonsense positions, so do not bother trying to spy. She has a knack of trying to play Green One Colour combos, so once you see her get 2 3-combos of the same kind, start guarding!

Lim Wan Ting : Observe her actions carefully. Usually she gives herself away, and a lot of zhahu occurs. Playing with her may occasionally be risky, but if she plays money, get ready for some earning. Use outpsyching, especially if you know she has your wanted tile.

Adelyn : Guard tiles.

Gladine : Outpsych and play around with tiles. Has knack of keeping doughnuts.

Sam Chan : Guard tiles properly. Do not let him build up tiles. Finish the game ASAP.

Jon Sung : Guard tiles properly, outpsyching may work.

Joshua Mei : No challenge, do not play unless you get money.

Geoffrey : Do not let him build up tiles. Finish the game ASAP. May occasionally do stupid stuff.

Yuan Wei : Ultimate mahjong loser with 23 continuous losses in a chalet. Play only if:

1. You have too much time

2. You need him to fill up the position

3. You are playing money.

And that concludes the Guide for Total Idiots. Be aware that people who don't know how to play mahjong will be totally despised during chalets. Pick up your mahjong skills, and obliterate them. Good luck. Have fun winning during Christmas.

Best wishes,
Lim Peh

yourMOTHERdied @ 6:44 AM!!